Sheriff Justice: The goddamn Germans got nothin' to do with it! Junior: What'd he say? Sheriff Justice: Shut up! One shit at a time! Junior: All right. The fact that you are a sheriff is not germane to the situation. But I'm in high speed pursuit! Don't you hear good? Sheriff Branford: I hear perfectly. Justice, of Texas! Sheriff Branford: Texas? You realize of course that you are out of your jurisdiction? I suggest that you let my department handle the situation. Sheriff Branford: Did you say that you are a sheriff? Sheriff Justice: That's a big ten-four! This is Sheriff Buford T. Junior: Good idea! Sheriff Justice: What the hell would you know?! Deputy Sheriff: Did you see that? They went right through our road block! Sheriff Justice: You sumbitches couldn't close an umbrella! Sheriff Justice: : This is Sheriff Buford T. Junior: Damn, he had a lot of friends, didn't he? Sheriff Justice: If they'd have cremated the sumbitch, I'd have been kickin' that Mr. Justice look like a possum's pecker! Junior: Except for that- Sheriff Justice: Shut yo' ass. Snowman: Will you get serious? Can you drive this thing? Back it up! Bandit: Oh, shut up! Snowman: Whoa, hold it! I said BACK it up, not RAISE it up! Hold it! The beer! Watch the beer! Bandit: Y'all right? Snowman: VERY funny, VERY funny! Bandit: I thought it was funny.
That's called bootleggin' and that's against the law.īandit and Snowman break into the warehouse holding the beer] Bandit: Hey, want a beer? Snowman: Well, son! Redneck heaven! How do we load all this stuff though? Bandit: Hey, I'll load it on with this! Snowman: You can't drive no forklift! Bandit: I can drive any forkin' thing around. No - we gotta go to Texas and pick up 400 cases of Coors. Snowman: Oh, really? What we gonna do, kidnap the Pope or somethin? Bandit: How'd you guess. A big chance - to make a run, for some big bucks. But in the future Cledus, I will never ever do you wrong again. Bandit: In the past, I may have done you wrong. Why do you want that beer so bad? Little Enos: Cause he's thirsty, dummy! Why don't you say something bad about my mother? Little Enos: Yo' mamma is so ugly- Bandit: Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute. Little Enos: You know, I think you're just a little bit scared. The problem here, is that Coors beer, you take that east of Texas and that's uh, that's bootlegging. Bandit: You watch your language, little lady. Little Enos: It ain't never been done before, hot shit. Little Enos: Well a legend and an out-of-work bum look a lot alike, Daddy!ĭialogue Bandit: Just what the hell you want? Big Enos: For you to get outta this dumbass rodeo, and accept a real challenge! Bandit: Now, you want me to drive to Texarkana, pick up 400 cases of Coors and come back in 28 hours.I'm gettin' worried about Fred here, he's lookin' a little thin in the skin!.
( Throws notepad aside) Hell, I got to go. You got the one Snowman! I'm eastbound and down!.Hey, you got peanut butter or somethin' in your ears? Tell me what that woman's got on! (Pause) Her mind? Ten-four!.I'm running blocker for 400 cases of illegal booze! For the money, for the glory, and for the fun. Makes me think you're listening to a radio station in Savannah. I find it hard to look at you Waynette, especially when you've got those things in your hair.
It must be a bitch finding suits size 68 extra fat and a 12 dwarf.
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